The closest thing to DNF I have ever known

Easter crafts are coming a bit early as the last week of term beckons. As last year, Scott really enjoyed egg painting so I can foresee more of this happening over the Easter break.

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We also did some pirate themed eggs complete with treasure chest, desert island and plank!

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The other simple pleasure of the day was derived from making jelly. It really is the small things! I realise that this series of pictures is very self indulgent, but his wee face was magic – he loved ripping the jelly apart and was super excited about his “green slime” getting ready.

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Gymnastics was busy this week and Scott enjoyed it as usual:

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I have been neglecting the baking recently, but I am discovering that I cannot bake and train for a marathon. I made a Great British Bake Off Whipped Chocolate Layer Cake for my mum for Mothers Day. It turned into an endurance event on Friday evening to rival marathon training and I clumsily knocked over one of the cakes while it was cooling. The tears did fall and I thought I had blown the whole thing. I considered re-baking another cake but just couldn’t face it so I somehow managed to cobble the broken cake together for the middle layer.

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The chocolate butter-cream is made with cocoa, dark chocolate (70% solids), double cream, butter and meringue (sugar and egg whites) and it is delicious. I think I may make it again, but the cake making has scarred me a bit! As usual, I am learning that juggling does not work and the balls, or in this case, the cake, gets dropped. I have been desperately tired. I am loving marathon training in so many ways and feel really good to be doing something that makes me feel so alive, but the combination of an exceptionally busy time at work and a boy that drags me from bed at 5.45 am is taking its toll. It hasn’t helped that I have had a streaming cold most of this week.

Today’s 17 miler did not come with great expectations. To be fair, I have had two good 8 mile runs this week, but today’s run was the worst ever. I started to feel uncomfortable as I hit the 8.5 mark and things got progressively worse. I had to stop at 10 miles as I had an agonising stitch/cramping in my side and I walked for a couple of minutes. I am ashamed to say that I was not mentally strong enough today and resorted to walking on a further two occasions. I am so disappointed in myself. My 8.5 miles back were incredibly slow and I finished it fully 21 minutes slower than I did my first half.  DNF stands for Did Not Finish and I was as close as it gets to this state. This is the first time that my average speed has dipped to over 9 minute miles. I am gutted. I have to really evaluate if I can do this. I came into the house and collapsed into tears in a mixture of exhaustion and disappointment. Unfortunately my Garmin my be ruining my love of running. I am fixating on times and probably piling on too much pressure. I may have to accept that completing is going to be good enough. I am desperately struggling with my running nutrition. I find pre-run carb loading nigh on impossible and the gels are not working during running. I had terrible cramping today and was sick at 12 miles. My stomach doesn’t hold up well at the best of times and I suffer from IBS, runners trots and am at a loss as to where to turn now for in-run nutrition. I know I need something but am not sure what. The prospect of jelly babies is making me queasy. I may have to try Lucozade sport drink and accept buying one of those mega awkward looking running belts to carry my bottles. Any expert advice gratefully received! I am scheduled to run my highest mileage to date next week – 2 xs 8 miles, 2 xs 5 miles, 1 x 18 miles (plus one cross-training session) and cannot face it. I especially cannot face that same road again. 8.5 miles from Bellesdale takes one through Fairlie to Hunterston and onto the coastal path. I made it just to the 30 zone at West Kilbride before my 8.5 miles were up. My confidence is shot and my body broken. I suffered nasty blistering at the bottom of my toes today too.

Look away now…

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Yes, I felt this bad. Bit of thinking to do.

Happy Mothers Day to mums everywhere, especially my own.

I’ll finish with some Winnie the Pooh wisdom for mums;

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